Sometimes the Treatment is Worse Than the Disease

Let's say I saw a fly land on your face, and I casually brushed it off with my finger. You'd think nothing of it, right?

Now imagine, that instead of using my finger, I pulled out a baseball bat and beat every inch of your body.

That's chemotherapy.

.. and Alyssa is going through it right now. Her first cycle is 3 days long, and consists of:


If there's any "silver lining" to any of this, it's that she's completely sedated through all of this and won't feel a thing (in the event of any adverse reactions). However, this does little to comfort my wife and I who are pretty shaken up right now -- things are moving so quick. We just signed consent forms allowing something that could potentially kill our child -- so, I think we're entitled a little leeway. 

The nurses administering the drugs have been wonderful; happily answering any and all of our questions and helping alleviate concerns. Although, I must admit, the more I learn about the drugs being used the worse I actually feel. The possible side-effects to the multiple drugs are quite extensive, and range from mild to fatal -- and you may not experience them immediately. Many of them are "long-term", meaning that one day, 20 years from now, she could suddenly develop secondary Leukemia. Great, huh?

That being said, what can you do? We've slowly been learning to readjust our outlook to the present, rather than the future. We can't control the future anymore than we can change the past -- we can only focus on the today. The now. We have to be there for our little princess when she needs us most.  
Unknown June 23, 2012 at 3:56 AM said...

It's shocking that they responded so quickly - within three days she had surgery and started chemo? I found your blog on Reddit. Thanks for sharing your story, and I've got all the hope in the world that Alyssa will live a long and healthy life.

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